Genius Arenas

Gilbert Arenas is hoarding basketball jerseys at each city he plays. Check out this tidbit from the Washington Post:

"Arenas said he has about 160 autographed jerseys. With the help of memorabilia shops, a few jersey companies and members of the Wizards' public relations staff, Arenas has been accumulating new and old jerseys from opposing players and former legends at every stop.
'I got Wilt Chamberlain, Magic, Jordan,' Arenas said. 'When I'm done, I'm going to build an all-glass gym and have them built in the floor.'"

If I were God, I'd hire Gilbert to be the lead architect for the YMCA in heaven. Seriously, that gym is going to be the greatest man-made object since the Pyramids.

At the Ole Ball Park

Me and Jim up and bought some bleacher seats to the O's game last night against the powerhouse Devil Rays. I think it's a great idea to go to the second game of the season. Compared to opening day, it' has half the crowd, half the fireworks, and half the lame fanfare and celebration, and you still get an early glimpse of the team. And if this game is an indication of the rest of the season for the O's, pick up the whole O's lineup for your fantasy team, at least for the month of April. Jay Gibbons may have even earned a spot on my team. Everyone was jumping out of the gate. We batted around twice in the first 4 innings and Brian Roberts had 5 plate appearances in 5 innings. Although, it's possible that going up against Seth McClung, who handily rhymes with McDung, will skew the offensive stats a bit. On the negative, Bedard looked a bit shakey, and if we weren't at the slaughter rule by the 5th inning, he may not have lasted for the win. So it's not exactly an impressive win, but it's good to see the runs on the board.

One non-game highlight was a guy 4 rows back yelling at Johnny Gomes, the D-Rays' right fielder. I've heard from SportsCenter that his name is pronounced as if it rhymed with "homes", but this guy persisted to continuously yell "hey GO-MEZ" over and over. He didn't really have any insults for him or classic put-downs, yet it seemed uproariously funny every time he yelled "Hey Go-mez". By the 3rd inning, he had about 10 other people (including me) just yelling "Go-Mez". Our whole section was eventually saying "Let's Go Go-Mez" while eveyone one else in the stadium was saying "Let's Go Orioles". We would even yell "Go-Mez!" instead of "Charge!". And to this moment, I have no idea why we were doing this. Actually, I just figured out why. Go-Mez is the perfect name to shout. Go ahead, just shout it right now. You'll understand.

Other ballpark highlights included the "Bird Man", (who was some guy sitting in the back of our section with an orange and black pom-pom wig and a toucan nose who would occasionally run to the front of the section and yell incoherently), the token Wizards Wrap-up show caller asking the Oriole Bird for an autograph (I'll let Jim explain that), and going a perfect 0-3 in the Crab Shuffle, Hot Dog Race, and Guess the Year contests on the Jumbo Screen. Plus, I still have hair in my mouth from the free O's fleece blanket they gave out, which is a great way to take home a part of the game.

All in all, it was a freezing night, a blowout game, and an expensive dinner. Everything you want and more at the ole ball park.

Act Like You Know!

Um......

You guys know that was a WOMEN'S Game, right?

Heroes in a Half Shell

I watched the Terps' monumental comeback against Duke last night in the women's champ game. It was thoroughly entertaining and I almost left to go riot on campus. But then I remembered that it's just the women. And, for the record, I would never be watching women's basketball if Maryland wasn't in it, playing for a national title. And I wouldn't be as entertained if we weren't smashing the hopes and dreams of a senior led Duke team that acted like the trophy was already on a flight back to Durham. I guess we didn't get the memo. Sorry Duke. Now WE are only 1 of 4 schools in the country that have both a men's and women's basketball title and NOT YOU.

Anyway, last night was also the most exciting sporting event of my wife's life. Never once, for as long as I've known her, has she ever wanted to high five me during a game on TV. She even said the obligitory anxious quote of "Are we gonna win??" with 9:48 remaining in the game. I asked her, out of all the times I've dragged you to the TV to watch a Skins, Mets, Orioles, Wizards, or Men's Terps game, why now are you this excited about a sports game?? Her answer: "I think it's because they are women". Hmmm....I still don't understand what exactly that means. I just hope this doesn't mean I have to start watching women's basketball as a trade for me watching men's basketball. She also told me not to blog about this, but I'd be doing us all an injustice if I didn't.

O Baby!

The O's won their Opening Day game against the Tampa Devil Rays, final score 9-6. Rodrigo Lopez looked a bit shaky, but the O's bats got it done. We hit like 4 homeruns. It was rad.

Could someone please sign Melvin Mora for next year? I heard the negotiations went something like this....

Mora- I would like 3 years, $30 Million.

O's - How about 3 years, $24 Million?

Mora - No, that is too low. I am pretty good. Plus, I'm loyal. I was the only one who went to Elrod's funeral, and dude creeped me out. How about 3 years, $28 Million?

O's - How about 3 years, $24 Million?

Mora - Um, no. Like I said, that is too low. Did you see how much money BJ Ryan got last year? And Dude had like one good year. I've been here forever. I became an All-Star here. I want to stay here.

O's - How about 3 years, $24 Million?

Mora - Dude! No! I am worth at least $9 Million a year. How about adding more years? How about 4 years, $32 Million?

O's - How about 3 years, $24 Million?

Mora - I don't feel like you are listening to me. I am better than Jay Gibbons. Ask anyone! Now you are trying to pay me like my name is Jay Gibbons. What is up with that?

O's - How about 3 years, $24 Million?

Mora- Um..........

O's - How about 3 years, $24 Mi-Millionze?

Mora - Are you OK?

O's - How ab-b-b-bout 3 years, $24 M-m-million?

Mora - I think this machine is broken.

Josh Baskin - You have to unplug the machine for it to work correctly. Sock me in the 3 more tiiiiimes!

Mora - Oh, Ok, thanks.

(Mora unplags machine)

Josh Baskin - OK, now you have to get a quarter in the mouth of the Geenie.

(Mora, on his 1st try, sinks a quarter into the mouth of the Geenie. The machine begins to smoke and shake and stuff)

Josh Baskin - Great! Now you have to make a wish.

Mora - Now, how about 3 years, $30 Million?

O's - Make a wish.

Mora - Um.....

Josh Baskin - I wish I was big.

(Machine spits out a card that states "Your wish is granted")

Mora - Hey! You took my wish!

(Josh Baskin runs away)

Yawn V2.0

So after watching a "gem" of a game last night for the national title, I realized I didn't predict the game winner on this blog. So, without further ado, my prediction was: Florida. Did I get it right? Sweet! I'm back on top! Anyway, I'm extremely tired today because I had to stay up for the game. I really don't like how the title game has to start at 9:30pm. Yes, I know that the west coast says they have to have the game on during non-business hours. But, if I have to go to sleep by 10:30pm to be able to function at work, why do we on the east coast have to either sacrifice the second half of the game or 2 hours of precious sleep. If they moved it up to 8pm, the worst thing that would happen to those on the west coast is they'd get home from work in time for the second half. That doesn't seem fair to us. Although, maybe it's because the networks know that sports fans would rather walk around like zombies on Tuesday than miss a championship game. And it probably doesn't help that I played Dr. Mario for an hour after the game ended. I know I'm not in college anymore. Check that. I know I'm not in elementary school anymore.

Also, there was a lot of talk in the national media before the semi-final games about this tournament being the best one ever. After the last three (and most important) games, would you still consider this tournament the best 64 games ever? I know I was convinced that it was the best I've seen, but that was before these games, and now I'm not so sure. Maybe I'll ask Billy Packer his opinion and agree with whatever he says.

Speaking of YAWN

How crappy were those two Final Four games? So crappy that I let my wife change the channel at halftime of the second game. I felt like crying with a towel over my head like the Mason players, especially since I said they could win it all (Aaron has dubbed me King Minus, because whatever I say, the opposite will happen). I thought Mason could give us another thriller and pull it out, and at halftime it seemed like they had Florida just where they wanted them. Then...pressure and tiredness hit them like a dump truck. They missed layups and shot pressed threes. Jai Lewis would get beat on the dribble and then just shove the player. Before they knew it, Lee Humphrey's treys put them in a hole that had them believing, for the first time this tournament, that they don't belong here. As for LSU, they just plain old stunk up Indy like it was a landfill. Oh well, hopefully Billy Packer is right when he says that whenever the Final Four games are stinkers, the Championship game is "a gem". I'm sure we all trust Billy Packer's judgement, and if so, this game tonight will be better than the Laettner game. Get ready for the greatest game ever!

(YAWN)

Maryland (my alma-mater) is playing for a national championship. I wish this mattered to me....on second thought, I really don't wish this mattered to me.