No First Base Action for Javy - O's Notes

- It seems like Javy Lopez's conversion from catcher to first base has not gone the way everyone had hoped, kinda like rapper Mase's conversion to Christianity (Mase will now be known as "Murder Mase", That's Fly!). It seems like his frustration with his own fielding has also trickled over to his bat. Lopez was batting .139 through Wednesday. That sucks. So he will now have to make another conversion over to DH, kinda like how Mase has got to make another conversion over to 50 Cent's "G-Unit" record label. Newly acquired Kevin Millar, and Jeff Conine will probably "cowboy up" to that position.

- It's being reported today that newly acquired Kris Benson's wife, Anna, is divorcing him. They reports don't say much about the divorce itself, or how either of them are doing. Interestingly enough, these reports were issued the same day that Matt LeBlanc and his wife were announcing their divorce. Ed, the baseball playing monkey, was not available for comment on either situation.

- Nobody knows who's gonna play LF or CF. Nik Markakis has had a good spring, but he's young, and the managers aren't thrilled about throwing him out the wolves yet. Oh, and Patterson and Matos both suck equally. So that's a tight race.......to see who sucks more. I say, let the wild child show what he can do. Ooohh, I just typed the words "wild child show" in succession. My bad. How about, "I say we let the wild child reveal to the masses that he ain't no punk." There, that's better.

- Tejada has sucked during spring training, but everyone says he always sucks during spring training, and so they aren't worried. Should I have a problem with this?

-All-Star 2nd Baseman, Brian Roberts, is back after rehab, and he's looking as good as ever. Woo Hoo!

- But we have no bullpen. Oh.

- Our young starting pitching is looking good however. Reason for hope? I hope so. Is it a bad sign when you are hoping for hope?

I Don't See Why Not

News Flash: George Mason will win the NCAA Tournament. How crazy would that be? Well, no crazier than saying George Mason will beat UConn, UNC, and Michigan State to get there. And because of this I see absolutely no reason why the boys from Fairfax won't win two more games. So I am picking Mason to win it all for six reasons:

1. They have just as good of a shot to win it all as the other three, and I'd say a better shot than UCLA right now, who would have a hard time scoring 50 points on my old UMD co-ed champ intramural team, who's starting point guard was John Chacko.

2. Their offense is running on all cylinders and it's so simple that it's unstoppable. Their two big men are able to post and score with either a jump hook or drop-step. If they're double teamed, they kick it out to one of the three guards who will then knock down a shot. I wish I knew this when I coached little league with Brad Hunter in high school.

3. They have the right mind set. This team is actually listening to Coach Larranaga when he says that they should be having fun on the court, which keeps them relaxed and not pulling choke jobs like "Ball-Americans" Redick and Morrison. (Get it? Ball-Americans? Because they cried! Ha! Anyway...)

4. Because of Phil's Mom. For those who don't know, this comes from Tony Kornheiser's radio show. Phil is Tony's old show producer, who now produces for Dan Patrick, and Tony has on Phil's mom every year to fill out her bracket. This is because her picks are all based on Mascots, colors, funny-sounding names, and all those reasons people who don't know what they're doing pick brackets by. But every year, she picks something ludicrously random and then it happens. Guess who she picked to WIN IT ALL this year??? George Mason!!!
Go to www.thiswebsitestinks.com for proof.

5. Because I said the mid-majors don't belong in the tourney this year. After all my ranting about them, what's a better way for me to look like an idiot than for a mid-major to win it all. (And now, after this post, I can still look like I'm smart if they do win it all...I'm coving all bases here.)

6. Lastly, because the George Mason upset of UConn solidified my win in one of my two pools I played in this year. I'd like to thank Eric Schroeder for inviting me into his pool of Ohio State fans, many of whom had them at least in the final four, leaving me with a clear path to the basket, so to speak.

So clearly, going by these very logical arguments, George Mason is bringing home the big crystal basketball trophy back to the DC area, right down the street from Maryland's trophy and far away from Ohio State.

And remember, you heard it here first the second time.