O Baby!

The O's won their Opening Day game against the Tampa Devil Rays, final score 9-6. Rodrigo Lopez looked a bit shaky, but the O's bats got it done. We hit like 4 homeruns. It was rad.

Could someone please sign Melvin Mora for next year? I heard the negotiations went something like this....

Mora- I would like 3 years, $30 Million.

O's - How about 3 years, $24 Million?

Mora - No, that is too low. I am pretty good. Plus, I'm loyal. I was the only one who went to Elrod's funeral, and dude creeped me out. How about 3 years, $28 Million?

O's - How about 3 years, $24 Million?

Mora - Um, no. Like I said, that is too low. Did you see how much money BJ Ryan got last year? And Dude had like one good year. I've been here forever. I became an All-Star here. I want to stay here.

O's - How about 3 years, $24 Million?

Mora - Dude! No! I am worth at least $9 Million a year. How about adding more years? How about 4 years, $32 Million?

O's - How about 3 years, $24 Million?

Mora - I don't feel like you are listening to me. I am better than Jay Gibbons. Ask anyone! Now you are trying to pay me like my name is Jay Gibbons. What is up with that?

O's - How about 3 years, $24 Million?

Mora- Um..........

O's - How about 3 years, $24 Mi-Millionze?

Mora - Are you OK?

O's - How ab-b-b-bout 3 years, $24 M-m-million?

Mora - I think this machine is broken.

Josh Baskin - You have to unplug the machine for it to work correctly. Sock me in the 3 more tiiiiimes!

Mora - Oh, Ok, thanks.

(Mora unplags machine)

Josh Baskin - OK, now you have to get a quarter in the mouth of the Geenie.

(Mora, on his 1st try, sinks a quarter into the mouth of the Geenie. The machine begins to smoke and shake and stuff)

Josh Baskin - Great! Now you have to make a wish.

Mora - Now, how about 3 years, $30 Million?

O's - Make a wish.

Mora - Um.....

Josh Baskin - I wish I was big.

(Machine spits out a card that states "Your wish is granted")

Mora - Hey! You took my wish!

(Josh Baskin runs away)